The “Change-Ranger” - July 12, 2009

Although I’m nothing like a change-ranger yet, it’s a nickname Andrew has given to me to help me out of my periods of doubt – doubt that I’ll ever be able to fully comprehend and speak in Spanish; doubt that what I’m doing here makes a difference; doubt about where I’ll be spending the next 2 years of my life, which I find out on Thursday; doubt that my community will accept me. So at least thinking of the “change-ranger” puts a smile on my face, even if I doubt its truth.



On Thursday, I’ll know where I’m living for the next 2 years; I’ll know which other volunteers will be in my “cluster;” I’ll know whether or not I need to learn another language – Kichwa; I’ll know what needs the community identified during their initial interview with PC; and I’ll have a better idea of what project I’ll be working on. Note the emphasis on BETTER IDEA, because I really will have no idea what I’m doing until I’m at my site and spend a few weeks or months there.



I think I’ve had an open mind about this entire process, from last May when I sent in my application to packing my bags for Ecuador, having no idea what I really needed to bring or would want once I got here. And I’m trying to keep an open mind about my site placement, but the closer it gets, the more specifics I can give about what I want. I don’t even want to write them down for fear of jinxing things and tempting fate; or worse yet, getting everything I want only to find out that its like nothing I expected. But here goes… I WANT a site on the Coast or in the Oriente, or a transitional area; I WANT to work in public policy and tropical disease prevention; I WANT to be close by to my friends so we can get together on the weekends when we need a “mental health” day/s; and I WANT an awesome apartment with hot water, a toilet, electricity; and without bugs, rodents, reptiles, and other icky things.



However, I know I’ll survive wherever I’m placed, and I believe that wherever I’m placed is for a reason…I just hope they’re reasons I like J My biggest fear about site placement is having to learn Kichwa when I barely know Spanish. Part of me thinks that because I don’t know much Spanish, the powers that be wouldn’t put me in a site where I needed to learn Kichwa. But the other part of me thinks that because I’m like a blank slate, that may be reason enough to assign me to an indigenous site. There is no use in worrying, but I can’t help but think…



Next week all, or at least the most pressing questions, will be answered, and on Sunday I’ll be headed for my site to spend 5 days with my new host family, in my new community. Wish me luck!